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Dent, Jaida, Honest Poem

DENT, JAIDA

Jaida Dent
Age: 15, Grade: 10

School Name: Brooklyn Emerging Leaders Academy, Brooklyn, NY
Educator: Amara Thomas

Category: Poetry

Honest Poem

I was born on March 19
which makes me a Pisces, or an Aries I’m on the cusps
If that matters, it does, but whatever
I prefer spring as a season and my favorite color is yellow

I’m addicted to the taste of coffee
Partly for taste
Partly so I can stay short forever
I’ve been known to have a positive personality 
As long as you catch me when I’m feeling lukewarm
I know how to turn the dial all the way up or all the way down
I can never find the in-between area
The medium
The world could be ending and I’d still be acting like everything is all butterflies and rainbows
I like to live in a bubble
My own little world
But at some point 
You have to return to reality
And when I do I see the total chaos

I apologize…. a lot
Even if it’s not my fault
It’s like handing out sympathy apologies
But instead of you telling me about a past heartbreak 
I’m the one dusting up the broken pieces of our actions
I’ve been told that I’m too loud
I thought it was something I get from my mother
But I’ve realized it’s because I hold too much in
I think one day I’ll implode
And you hear all the things I’ve been meaning to say to your face

I’m a woman of my words 
But I find to be that I’m a complete hypocrite 
I know that’s true because I’ve written a poem about how 95% of people text things they could never say in person
Called myself out in front of my entire middle school
While trying to teach them a message
Like I’m Jesus and they, my disciples 

Don’t be fooled by my optimistic demeanor 
I’ve got a lot of fears in this brain of mine 
I fear that I’d lose my friends quicker than I can start a text convo
I fear that the world would end and I’d still be oblivious to it
I fear that my child wouldn’t be able to be held by its father.. because God said his time was up
My DNA is coated with the fate that my child may never know their dad
And that I’d lose the man I would’ve devoted my life too
“Til Death do they part”

I’m not in the armed forces 
But I wear a bullet vest like it’s part of my wardrobe 
I dodge bullets like I’m in the matrix
Only to realize I still got shot somehow
My wounds are an open book
You read my scars to find the fault lines in my bones
You follow my veins like a map
To find the girl hiding behind her own shadow
Smiles that crack off like chipped paint
Revealing that this is nothing but an illusion

I’m young
Reckless
I don’t know a lot 
But I do know this
I am a poet and I eat my silence as if it will make me whole.
So it’s okay if my coat pockets hold mistakes
Because I’m an unfinished work of art